Sunday, June 20, 2010

2 years later

Last night was the opening for "The Great Balancing Act", and after every opening night theres a bittersweet type of feeling. Like I said before, Ryan and I have been working on this for 2 years, theres been alot that has gone into the show, mostly emotions. Its exhausting, physically and mentally. Your up all hours of the night hunched over your easel, you got carpal tunnel and your eyes hurt. Not to mention all the technical problems.
So when opening night comes your so tired and out of it, its all a blur, and you say to yourself" what happened, can we do that again I missed it".
This feeling adds to the need of working toward another show, but it all happens the same. Everything is a endless loop of desire and need. oh well.

all of these images started with this piece, which came too me while listening to Muse's song "City of Delusion".

"Sweet Oblivion" - 36x48 - oil on canvas

my once fear of tornado's, and my new fascination with them brought certain thoughts to me.
When I finally overcame my fear I was going through a extremely hard time in my life. I had to face things I never wanted to before. It was hell. I could say it feels mentally like what a heroin addict must feel physically when going through detox. Your ridding yourself of these toxic things. And once it starts theres no going back, you have to go all the way.
I eventually found what I need to get through the darkness. I have that tool now, and am using it to face what remains. After I realized this my nightmares of tornado's stopped.

"Sweet Oblivion" is just about that. Oblivious to the dangers around you, with your head in the clouds.
She is gently pulling along her home in safety with certainty nothing bad will ever happen. While someones home and all their possessions are seconds away from being destroyed. Which is in fact reality. Bad things will happen, and when they happen you must be ready to face them, and deal with the rubble thats left behind.

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